Andy Rooney Quotes Page 2

“If dogs could talk it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one.”

“If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.”

“If you wonder what anyone thinks of you, consider what you think of them.”

“It’s paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn’t appeal to anyone.”

“Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives.”

“Not everyone has a right to his own opinion. If he doesn’t know the facts, his opinion doesn’t count.”

“Nothing in fine print is ever good news.”

“People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe.”

“The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong.”

“The biggest seller is cook books and the second is diet books – how not to eat what you’ve just learned how to cook.”

“The federal government has sponsored research that has produced a tomato that is perfect in every respect, except that you can’t eat it. We should make every effort to make sure this disease, often referred to as “progress”, doesn’t spread.”

“There are idiots who will buy anything as long as it costs enough.”

“Vegetarian – that’s an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter.”

“We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers. More college graduates ought to become plumbers or electricians, then go home at night and
read Shakespeare.”

“We’re all proud of making little mistakes. It gives us the feeling we don’t make any big ones.”