Andy Weir Quotes

“A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow. Don't wait for an inspired ending to come to mind. Work your way to the ending and see what comes up.”

“A story in your head isn't a story. It's just a daydream until you actually write it down. So write it down.”

“Computer programming is pretty much guaranteed income. I'm good at it, and I like it.”

“A clumsy, awkward success is still a success.”

“Anyone who makes you money is a friend.”

“Can't complain. Still do, though.”

“Coffee's just a bad kind of tea.”

“If you want to make babies, somebody's got to get fucked.”

“No idiot-proofing can overcome a determined idiot.”

“Only Americans wear Hawaiian shirts on the moon.”

“A human body is more like a borderless police state.”

“Cool thing about pendulums: The time it takes for one to swing forward and backward — the period — won’t change, no matter how wide it swings. If it’s got a lot of energy, it’ll swing farther and faster, but the period will still be the same. This is what mechanical clocks take advantage of to keep time. That period ends up being driven by two things, and two things only: the length of the pendulum and gravity.”

“If I had a nickel for every time I wanted to smack a kid’s parents for not teaching them even the most basic things… well… I’d have enough nickels to put in a sock and smack those parents with it.”

“The best ancient Greek philosophers always carried stopwatches in their togas.”

“As a chemist, Vogel knew how to make a bomb. In fact, much of his training was to avoid making them by mistake.”

“Beers for everyone if I get back to Earth.”

“Believe me, even back on Earth a botanist/mechanical engineer doesn’t exactly have ladies lined up at the door.”

“Duct tape is magic and should be worshipped.”

“I guess you could call it a failure, but I prefer the term learning experience.”

“It would kill me to death.”

“So I came up with a brilliant plan that didn't work.”

“There’s a difference between knowing it and really experiencing it.”