Dorothy Parker Quotes

Who is Dorothy Parker?

Dorothy Parker was an American poet, writer and satirist. She is known for her witty poems and for the screenplay for 'A Star Is Born' which is made into several movies bearing that title.

Born August 22, 1893
Died June 07, 1967

Books by Dorothy Parker


Best 76 Quotes by Dorothy Parker | Page 1 of 3

“A hangover is the wrath of grapes.”

Dorothy Parker

“A little bad taste is like a nice dash of paprika.”

Dorothy Parker

“Better be left by twenty dears
Than lie in a love-less bed;
Better a loaf that’s wet with tears,
Than cold, unsalted bread.”

Dorothy Parker

“Constant use had not worn ragged the fabric of their friendship.”

Dorothy Parker

“Don't look at me in that tone of voice.”

Dorothy Parker

“Ducking for apples – change one letter and it's the story of my life.”

Dorothy Parker

“Four be the things I'd have been better without: love, curiosity, freckles and doubt.”

Dorothy Parker

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“He and I had an office so tiny, that an inch smaller and it would have been adultery.”

Dorothy Parker

“Heterosexuality is not normal, it's just common.”

Dorothy Parker

“His voice was as intimate as the rustle of sheets.”

Dorothy Parker

“How do people go to sleep? I’m afraid I’ve lost the knack.”

Dorothy Parker

“I don't care what is written about me so long as it isn't true.”

Dorothy Parker

“I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be darling at it.”

Dorothy Parker

“I hate writing, I love having written.”

Dorothy Parker

Products by Dorothy Parker

“I like to have a martini,
Two at the very most.
After three I'm under the table,
after four I'm under my host.”

Dorothy Parker

“I require three things in a man: he must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.”

Dorothy Parker

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“Nothing can be more important than giving children books.”


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“I was always sweet, at first. Oh, it's so easy to be sweet to people before you love them.”

Dorothy Parker

“I won't telephone him. I'll never telephone him again as long as I live. He'll rot in hell, before I'll call him up. You don't have to give me strength, God; I have it myself. If he wanted me, he could get me. He knows where I am. He knows I'm waiting here. He's so sure of me, so sure. I wonder why they hate you, as soon as they are sure of you.”

Dorothy Parker

“I'd like to have money. And I'd like to be a good writer. These two can come together, and I hope they will, but if that's too adorable, I'd rather have money.”

Dorothy Parker

“I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.”

Dorothy Parker

“I'm never going to accomplish anything; that's perfectly clear to me. I'm never going to be famous. My name will never be writ large on the roster of Those Who Do Things. I don't do anything. Not one single thing. I used to bite my nails, but I don't even do that any more.”

Dorothy Parker

“I'm not a writer with a drinking problem, I'm a drinker with a writing problem.”

Dorothy Parker

“If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy.”

Dorothy Parker

“It's not the tragedies that kill us; it's the messes.”

Dorothy Parker

“It’s easier to write about those you hate—just as it’s easier to criticize a bad play or a bad book.”

Dorothy Parker

“Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it and it darts away.”

Dorothy Parker

“Money cannot buy health, but I'd settle for a diamond-studded
wheelchair.”

Dorothy Parker

“Never complain, never explain.”

Dorothy Parker

Products by Dorothy Parker

“Now I know the things I know, and I do the things I do; and if you do not like me so, to hell, my love, with you!”

Dorothy Parker

“One more drink and I’ll be under the host.”

Dorothy Parker

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“If people don't want to listen to you, what makes you think they want to hear from your sweater?”


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