Who the heck is Josh Billings?

Pen name of American humorist Henry Wheeler Shaw.

Quotes by Josh Billings

“A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.”

Josh Billings

“A slander is like a hornet: If you cannot kill it dead at the first blow, better not to strike at it.”

Josh Billings

“As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand.”

Josh Billings

“Be like a postage stamp – stick to one thing until you get there.”

Josh Billings

“Better make a weak man your enemy than your friend.”

Josh Billings

“Debt is a trap which man sets and baits himself, and then deliberately gets into.”

Josh Billings

“Don’t put off till tomorrow what can be enjoyed today.”

Josh Billings

“Experience is a school where a man learns what a big fool he has been.”

Josh Billings

“Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt of, not swallowed.”

Josh Billings

“Health is like money, we never have a true idea of its value until we lose it.”

Josh Billings

“I’ve never known a person to live to be one hundred and be remarkable for anything else.”

Josh Billings

“If the animals had reason, they would act just as ridiculous as we menfolks do.”

Josh Billings

“If you do not know how to lie, cheat, and steal – turn your attention to politics and learn.”

Josh Billings

“It ain’t often that a man’s reputation outlasts his money.”

Josh Billings

“It ain’t so much trouble to get rich as it is to tell when we have got rich.”

Josh Billings

“Laughter is the sensation of feeling good all over and showing it principally in one place.”

Josh Billings

“Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well.”

Josh Billings

“Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope.”

Josh Billings

“Men of genius are like eagles, they live on what they kill, while men of talents are like crows, they live on what has been killed for them.”

Josh Billings

“Music hath charms to soothe the savage beast – but I’d try a revolver first.”

Josh Billings

“Never work before breakfast; if you have to work before breakfast, eat your breakfast first.”

Josh Billings

“One of the greatest victories you can gain over someone is to beat him at politeness.”

Josh Billings

“One of the rarest things that a man ever does is to do the best he can.”

Josh Billings

“One-half the troubles of this life can be traced to saying yes too quickly and not saying no soon enough.”

Josh Billings

“Opinions should be formed with great caution – and changed with greater.”

Josh Billings

“Silence is one of the hardest arguments to refute.”

Josh Billings

“Solitude is a good place to visit but a poor place to stay.”

Josh Billings

“The best advice I was ever given was on my twenty-first birthday when my father said, “Son, here’s a million dollars. Don’t lose it.”

Josh Billings

“The best way to convince a fool that he is wrong is to let him have his own way.”

Josh Billings

“The world can never be considered educated until we spend as much on books as we do on chewing gum.”

Josh Billings

“There are lots of people who mistake their imagination for their memory.”

Josh Billings

“There are some people so addicted to exaggeration that they can’t tell the truth without lying.”

Josh Billings

“There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness.”

Josh Billings

“There may come a time when the lion and the lamb will lie down together, but I am still betting on the lion.”

Josh Billings

“To bring up a child in the way he should go, travel that way yourself.”

Josh Billings

“We hate those who will not take our advice, and despise them who do.”

Josh Billings