Mark Twain Quotes

“All generalizations are false, including this one.”

“Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.”

“Do the right thing. It will gratify some people and astonish the rest.”

“Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.”

“Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds, on the heel that has crushed it.”

“Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I’ve done it thousands of times.”

“Good breeding consists of concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.”

“Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time.”

“History doesn’t repeat, but it rhymes.”

“How lucky Adam was. He knew when he said a good thing, nobody had said it before.”

“I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying that I approved of it.”

“I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell-you see, I have friends in both places.”

“I was seldom able to see an opportunity until it had ceased to be one.”

“If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way.”

“It’s no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.”

“Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to.”

“Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident.”

“Necessity is the mother of taking chances.”

“October. This is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks in. The others are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August and February.”

“Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial ‘we.’ ”

“The more you explain it, the more I don’t understand it.”

“The most interesting information comes from children because they tell all they know and then stop.”

“There are several good protections against temptations, but the surest is cowardice.”

“Thunder is good, thunder is impressive; but it is lightning that does the work.”

“We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it—and stop there; lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove-lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove-lid again—and that is well; but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.”

“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”

“All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence and then success is sure.”

“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.”

“Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.”

“Comparison is the death of joy.”