Mark Wolynn Quotes

“Brain scans demonstrate that many of the same neurons and regions of the brain become activated whether we’re imagining an event or actually living it.”

“Children with a parent who was traumatized during the Cambodian genocide, for example, tend to suffer from depression and anxiety. Similarly, children of Australian Vietnam War veterans have higher rates of suicide than the general population.”

“Epigenetic changes are the chemical modifications that occur in our cells as a result of a traumatic event.”

“Epigenetics is the study of heritable changes in gene function that occur without a change in the sequence of the DNA.”

“Even if humans receive supportive parenting as infants, we are still the recipients of the stress our parents experienced before we were conceived.”

“Everything that happens to us has merit, whether we recognize the surface significance of it or not.”

“Ignoring the pain actually deepens it. What is hidden from sight often increases in intensity.”

“Instinctively loyal, children often repeat their parents’ sorrows and relive their misfortunes.”

“Meditators, after only eight hours of meditation, experienced clear genetic and molecular changes, including decreased levels of pro-inflammatory genes, which would enable them to physically recover from stressful situations more quickly.”

“Native American youths, like the children of war veterans, like the children of Holocaust survivors, like the children of Cambodian genocide survivors, and like the children of the World Trade Center attack survivors, are among the modern world’s newest victims of transgenerational trauma.”

“New experiences can create new neural pathways. These new neural pathways become strengthened through repetition and deepened through focused attention. Essentially, the more we practice something, the more we train our brain to change.”

“Not all behaviors expressed by us actually originate from us. They can easily belong to family members who came before us. We can merely be carrying the feelings for them or sharing them. We call these 'identification feelings'.”

“Once a new brain map is established, new thoughts, feelings, and behaviors can emerge organically, expanding our repertoire when old fears arise.”

“One thing is clear: life sends us forward with something unresolved from the past.”

“Our very survival depends on being able to screen out potential attacks.”

“Our vitality — the life force that comes to us from our parents — can become blocked when our connection to them is compromised.”

“Remaining silent about family pain is rarely an effective strategy for healing it. The suffering will surface again at a later time, often expressing in the fears or symptoms of a later generation.”

“Researchers are now finding that our thoughts, inner images, and daily practices, such as visualization and meditation, can change the way our genes express.”

“Sometimes, the heart must break in order to open.”

“The emotions, traits, and behaviors we reject in our parents will likely live on in us. It’s our unconscious way of loving them, a way to bring them back into our lives.”

“The notion that we inherit and 'relive' aspects of family trauma has been the subject of many books by the renowned German psychotherapist Bert Hellinger.”

“The words we use to describe our worries and struggles can say more than we realize.”

“The worst part is that the very thing that holds us back is often invisible to us, keeping us frustrated and confused.”

“There is often sadness hibernating beneath your angry words. The sadness won’t kill you. The anger actually might.”

“Those of us who feel that we didn’t receive enough from our parents, especially from our mothers, often feel that we don’t receive enough from life.”

“Too often, our intentions are at odds with our actions.”

“Until we uncover the actual triggering event in our family history, we can relive fears and feelings that don’t belong to us — unconscious fragments of a trauma — and we will think they’re ours.”

“When brain cells activate together, the connection between them strengthens. Simply put, each time we repeat a particular experience, it becomes more ingrained in us. With enough repetition, it can become automatic.”

“When entangled, you unconsciously carry the feelings, symptoms, behaviors, or hardships of an earlier member of your family system as if these were your own.”

“When family members lead unhappy lives or suffer an extremely difficult fate, it’s often easier to reject them than to feel the pain of loving them. Anger is often an easier emotion to feel than sadness.”