Steve Martin Quotes

Who is Steve Martin?

Stephen Glenn Martin is an American actor, comedian, writer, producer, and musician.

Born August 14, 1945
Age 77 years old

Books by Steve Martin

Steve Martin Sources

Best 28 Quotes by Steve Martin

“A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”

“Be so good they can’t ignore you.”

“Be undeniably good.”

“Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you'll be a mile away and have his shoes.”

“Boy, those French! They have a different word for everything.”

“Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke.”

“First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.”

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“I believe entertainment can aspire to be art, and can become art, but if you set out to make art you're an idiot.”

“I believe in equality. Equality for everybody. No matter how stupid they are or how superior I am to them.”

“I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.”

“I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.”

“I saw the movie, 'Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon' and was surprised because I didn't see any tigers or dragons. And then I realized why: they're crouching and hidden.”

“I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.”

“I've got to keep breathing. It'll be my worst business mistake if I don't.”

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“I've heard lots of people lie to themselves but they never fool anyone.”

“If you've got a dollar and you spend 29 cents on a loaf of bread, you've got 71 cents left; But if you've got seventeen grand and you spend 29 cents on a loaf of bread, you've still got seventeen grand. There's a math lesson for you.”

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“If it weren't for acid, you might not have an iPod, and you definitely would not have some of the best music in your iPod.”

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“Some people have a way with words, and other people... oh, uh, not have way.”

“Somewhere in the world is the world's worst doctor and he could be yours.”

“Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.”

“The banjo is such a happy instrument--you can't play a sad song on the banjo - it always comes out so cheerful.”

“Writer's block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.”

“You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.”

An Object of Beauty Quotes

“You want to know how I think art should be taught to children? Take them to a museum and say, 'This is art, and you can't do it.'”

An Object of Beauty

Born Standing Up Quotes

“Thankfully, persistence is a great substitute for talent.”

Born Standing Up

L.A. Story and Roxanne Quotes

“Why sip from a tea cup, when you can drink from the river.”

L.A. Story and Roxanne

Shopgirl Quotes

“It's pain that changes our lives.”


“She tried to get even with him through psychological warfare but couldn't, because he didn't care.”


The Pleasure of My Company Quotes

“There are few takers for the quiet heart.”

The Pleasure of My Company

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“I've never had a grand plan. I've only just tried to keep open to many different possibilities, have fun and work with people who are passionate about what they do.”

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