Wilson Mizner Quotes

Why should I know Wilson Mizner?

American playwright and raconteur known for the plays The Deep Purple and The Greyhound.

Born May 19, 1876
Died April 03, 1933

Best 34 Quotes by Wilson Mizner

“A drama critic is a person who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant.”

Wilson Mizner

“A fellow who is always declaring he’s no fool usually has his suspicions.”

Wilson Mizner

“A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he gets to know something.”

Wilson Mizner

“A slave has but one master. An ambition man, has as many as there are people who helped him get his fortune.”

Wilson Mizner

“Be nice to people on your way up, because you’ll meet them on your way down.”

Wilson Mizner

“Do not be desirous of having things done quickly. Do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished.”

Wilson Mizner

“Don’t talk about yourself; it will be done when you leave.”

Wilson Mizner

“Gambling: The sure way of getting nothing for something.”

Wilson Mizner

“Hollywood is a trip through a sewer in a glass-bottomed boat.”

Wilson Mizner

“I can usually judge a fellow by what he laughs at.”

Wilson Mizner

“I hate careless flattery, the kind that exhausts you in your efforts to believe it.”

Wilson Mizner

“I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an education.”

Wilson Mizner

“I’d rather know a square guy than own a square mile.”

Wilson Mizner

“I’ve had ample contact with lawyers, and I’m convinced that the only fortune they ever leave is their own.”

Wilson Mizner

“I’ve known countless people who were reservoirs of learning, yet never had a thought.”

Wilson Mizner

“I’ve spent several years in Hollywood, and I still think the movie heroes are in the audience.”

Wilson Mizner

“In order to excel, you must be completely dedicated to your chosen sport. You must also be prepared to work hard and be willing to accept destructive criticism. Without 100 percent dedication, you won’t be able to do this.”

Wilson Mizner

“In the battle of existence, talent is the punch; tact is the clever footwork.”

Wilson Mizner

“It is not in life, but in art that self-fulfillment is to be found.”

Wilson Mizner

“Life’s a tough proposition, and the first hundred years are the hardest.”

Wilson Mizner

“Most hard-boiled people are half-baked.”

Wilson Mizner

“The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.”

Wilson Mizner

“The cuckoo who is on to himself is halfway out of the clock.”

Wilson Mizner

“The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn’t been asleep.”

Wilson Mizner

“The most efficient water power in the world – women’s tears.”

Wilson Mizner

“The most pitiful human ailment is a birdseed heart.”

Wilson Mizner

“The only sure thing about luck is that it will change.”

Wilson Mizner

“The worst-tempered people I’ve ever met were the people who knew they were wrong.”

Wilson Mizner

“There’s nothing so comfortable as a small bankroll. A big one is always in danger.”

Wilson Mizner

“To my embarrassment I was born in bed with a lady.”

Wilson Mizner

“To profit from good advice requires more wisdom than to give it.”

Wilson Mizner

“To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism, to steal ideas from many is research.”

Wilson Mizner

“Treat a whore like a lady and a lady like a whore.”

Wilson Mizner

“Working for Warner Brothers is like fucking a porcupine: It’s a hundred pricks against one.”

Wilson Mizner